“Discouragement temps us to give up, but it's also the place where God builds us.”
Paul exhorts us in Colossians 3:1-4:
“Set your minds on things that are above, not on earthly things. For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God.”
That verse has been the anchor of my heart in this season. But I’ll be honest with you, there have been days when my mind was anything but set on things above.
Recently, discouragement hit me hard. I looked around at my life and saw others, some younger, some my own age-married, raising families, rooted in ministry, walking in what God had called them to. And then there was me: 44 years old, never married, single, five years out of rehab, back in school, still feeling like a sojourner in a wilderness with no clear path ahead. Discouragement set in.
My heart cried out: “Father, where are the promises? Are they ever going to come?”
The weight of that longing pressed in so hard that even in my pursuit of holiness, a thought crept in: “Why don’t I just go get a beer? No one will know.” For three days, that discouragement shadowed me.
But there I was one afternoon, floating in a kayak in the middle of a lake, pouring out every ounce of heartache, loneliness, and desire to God. With tears streaming, I shouted: “Where are the promises, O God? Where are they?”
And it reminded me of Proverbs 13:12:
“Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.”
My heart was sick because my hope felt deferred. Yet even in that moment of anguish, something shifted. I realized: yes, I am in the wilderness, but God has not abandoned me there. Just like Israel in the desert, just like Jesus in His forty days of testing, the wilderness isn’t the end, it’s the in-between. It’s the place where discouragement tempts us to give up, but it’s also the place where God builds us up.
Discouragement whispers, “You’re forgotten. You’re not cut out for this calling.” But God whispers back, “Your life is hidden in Me. Keep your eyes above.”
That’s the fight of the wilderness, where will we set our minds? Israel fixed theirs on lack and ended up grumbling. Jesus fixed His on the Word of God and overcame the enemy.
So, how do we navigate discouragement in wilderness seasons?
Cry Out Honestly – God can handle it. He met me in that kayak. He met David in the caves, Elijah under the broom tree, and Hannah in her barrenness. Honesty is the beginning of healing.
Set Your Mind Above – Colossians 3 is not a suggestion; it’s a survival key. When we fixate on what we lack, hope drains. When we fix our gaze on Christ, hope grows.
Remember the Wilderness is Temporary – Israel didn’t wander forever. Jesus didn’t fast forever. Your wilderness isn’t permanent; it’s preparation.
Cling to His Promises – Even if they feel delayed, His Word cannot return void. “Though it linger, wait for it; it will certainly come” (Habakkuk 2:3).
Keep Moving Forward – Don’t let discouragement paralyze you. Keep walking in obedience, even if all you can see is the next small step.
I haven’t “arrived” yet, I’m still waiting, still longing, still feeling the ache of deferred hope. But in the waiting, I’m learning that the wilderness is shaping me. It’s teaching me to lean on God in ways I never would if the promises came easily.
And maybe that’s what Paul meant: when we set our minds on things above, we discover that all of this, every tear, every wait, every unanswered longing, points us back to Him.
So if you’re weary in your wilderness today, hear this: the wilderness will not have the final word. God’s promises are still alive. And the sick heart of deferred hope will one day taste the tree of life.
“What is it all for?”
Him above.
